Tuesday, December 10

My take on things that matters very little and goes absolutely nowhere

The Specialized Goliath VS Small Bike Shop David topic has been beaten to death already, and it's only a few days old (and took an interesting turn late yesterday).  The following is a bit of a ramble, an attempt to cover ground not already covered, my personal view of the situation through Tuesday morning bleary eyes.  I'll probably run out of time, so don't expect me to pull this all together before I'm done or that I'll revisit this topic Thursday as I need to get back to talking about my new bib shorts (way more important).

I just found out about this whole thing on Sunday, even though it "broke" on Saturday.  At its birth, I was not hiding under a rock, but actually riding over many of them and posing my bike against one.
Cycling: IRL
So I missed the initial foray, but I got right to it Sunday morning.  With limited facts and a weary head, I produced this image for Facebooking along with some commentary about Specialized suing the earth for making tiny reproductions of itself called Globes™:

Had I known it would be included in the now infamous "Open Letter to Mike Sinyard" and the "Suck it Sinyard" tumblr page, I mighta tried harder to center the big red S.  Anyhoo... I went back later trying to edit the image description, clicked a couple wrong clicks in my four enchilada hangover, and deleted it.  Self-validating shares and likes gone.  All in all, an almost complete failure.

Later on, I posted this: 

One of my most beloved toys from my childhood... aside from my plastic, life-sized M-16 that I broke trying to crack the ice in the puddle in my back yard so I could drag my Stump Jumper through it behind my Huffy Wrangler.

Little did I know that someday my first real mountain bike would be a Stumpjumper.  Not to say my first two mountain bikes were imaginary (like my friends were when I was in elementary school), but they had death-defying plastic Shimano Exage components that were more decorative than functional.

My first "real" mountain bike, some time around 1992.

Yes, that is my 1992 Stumpjumper.

Yes, that is my son who is now 21.  He is pointing at a bike part that he called "gagas."

Yes, there is so much to make fun of there, but this isn't about me right now... remember?

I've owned a plethora of Specialized products since.  I'll admit that.  Let's move on to current times and the situation at hand.

I have yet to come across an article where they don't mention that the shop owner is a "Canadian veteran of the Afghanistan war."

I don't see why this is part of the story, other than to make us more sympathetic towards the "little guy." I mean, what if the shop owner was:

Black... I mean "African Canadian"

A lesbian

A Muslim

A lifelong, diehard Cleveland Brown's fan

What could draw more public sympathy/outcry/outrage than that?

Doesn't seem like it's part of the story, but it is now.

Don't get me wrong.  My dad was a vet, as are/were both my grandfathers.  Had I not been deaf in one ear when I tried to get into the Armed Forces back in 1989, I coulda been cannon fodder/a supply clerk for "The Big One" in 1990.

It's simply not worth making part of the story UNLESS you're already trying to sway public opinion, which I guess is how news is reported nowadays.

And all the hate cast right in Mike Sinyard's direction...

Is he really the megalomaniac in charge of the Specialized Kingdom, calling all the shots, right down to the color options on their Enduro™ Grips?  (Pay attention, Ergon. That shit is real.)

Or is this a regular old corporation with many departments and many heads and Mike can't control all the operations all the time?   The (very little) research I did resulted in a modest amount of "real" information, but apparently he is the majority owner and CEO... with Merida owning anywhere between 8 and 49% (I love the internet... so much useful/less data).

I just want to know one thing.

Did Mike Sinyard order the code red on Cafe Roubaix?

Or are Mike's foot soldiers just following his seven step plan of corporate aggression?

And speaking of shitting on people...

This is the one thing that I thought about the most.  The local shop I go to and Faster Mustache sponsor (Bike Source) heavily stocks Specialized.  I have many friends in their employ.  I also know a few people that own/manage shops that have their profits/debts heavily tied to Specialized as well.  I can only imagine how they felt when they heard the news of this awesome PR move.

Damn it.  Good people, they are.

Pull out and try to get an another anchor brand in the shop that isn't already in another shop three miles away (we're quite saturated with bike shops in the Queen City)?  Deny the fact that Specialized brings in beaucoup dinero?  Ignore the fact that a majority of their customers walking in the door will have never heard thing one about this debacle?

I don't know anything Honda Motor Corp might have done that was morally muddy when I decided to buy the Fit of Rage.  I'd heard bad things about Apple and yet I still bought an iPhone.  Sorry, I don't make a lot of major purchases that aren't bike related, so those are my best examples of how most (of my) purchases are made despite any knowledge of wrongdoing on the furthest other end of the transaction.

But I know this will cost those shops some money, and that sucks, and I wish (in one hand, shit in the other) that Specialized's legal team would get that they need to use their heads and their hearts once in awhile.

And I'm outta time.  So glad that really went nowhere and I can get back to talking about my new bibs tomorrow.


the original big ring said...

Gomer-fucking-Pyle! YOU tried to get into the armed forces?!?! Only steers and queers come from OHIO and you don't look much like a steer!

Well you learn something new about Dicky everyday.

And I'm not sending money or return postage what-cha-ma-fucking-call-it for an Enduro (™-™) sticker. That's like . . . seven Queen Elizabeth stamps! Put a few aside for me when we come down for our annual "Eat as much Mexican food and ride as much NC trail that you can in 7 days" pilgrimage.

dicky said...

Who are you?

Anonymous said...


naTron said...


Anonymous said...

Veteran, who happens to own a bike shop, wins! Specialized by bitch slapped by their pimp. Now is the time to push his advantage with allez tires and epic headbands.

lawfarm said...

Specialized is at it again.