My plan is to beat Harlan Price (or not)

It is now the time on Sprockets when we make our bikes ready to make great bike race. That Feedback Sports Alping digital hanging scale (with 55lb capacity) is gonna be the death of me. My old worn out treads had to go to make way for something with some edges on it. I had a new Crossmark to replace the Ignitor in the rear and four 2.35 Rampages to choose from for the front. With the aid of my scale I decided to make my front selection based on weight... disturbing.

Two of the Rampages weighed the same:

A nice plump 750 grams for a front tire with plenty of sexy time knobs and volume.

The other two also weighed the same, but different:

Same tire, 40 grams heavier. That's almost a tenth of a pound of rotating weight, massive rubber knobbed rotating weight. Meh. I guess I now have one back up race tire and two tires destined for the Death Stick. I know this happens all the time, but having the tools to discover it in my own bike room? I will just have to think less about how much money I have in "heavy" tires and think more about how much faster I am with the reduction in rotating weight.

After all the tire swapping (and even more grip douchery) the Meatplow has come down in weight. It was originally...

but now it's getting a little more thin air climbing friendly...

That's over a quarter of a pound dropped with proper tire selection. Now I am well within striking range of having a sub twenty pound "race bike". Assuming my crabon frok gets here sometime this month I'll be showing up the Six Hours of Warrior Creek gun fight with MG42 full auto belt fed machine gun.

And if it doesn't get here? Well let's just say that I will shed a tear and hope for a brighter tomorrow. I feel it will probably most certainly be here before I get to my more climbing heavy races like the Trans Sylvania and the Breck Epic, so I'm just not gonna get too emotional if another month goes by sans crabon.

In other news...

Harlan Price, a man larger than the mountains he rides upon, announced his intentions to make a mockery of the single speed class on Cyclingdirt.com.

Cycling Videos on CyclingDirt

How 'bout that? Another tired pro with swollen vertebrae looking to beat up on us unsuspecting single speeders. Maybe Gunnar has a spare cane for you Harlan. Anyways he will be racing the Trans Sylvania Epic and also four of the NUE Races on a SS, no doubt giving The Pflug a run for his money and pushing the little people one step further away from the podium. Harlan says he will focus more on socializing and fun, so perhaps this is the year we will see him doing kegstands the night before the Shenandoah 100. I do like his idea of winning the single speed Stars and Stripes jersey at Marathon Nationals in July and then burning it on the podium. This would be even better than my non-appearance at the 2006 24 hour Worlds podium ceremony, and a much more fascinating spectacle for Cyclingnews.com. Burn it Harlan, burn it like a... you know, it's pretty hard to think of a politically correct burning reference. Just burn it Harlan.

BTW: Harlan is racing for a good cause, so check it out: Team CF.

Tifosi Man Chu

At least the slow down at work hasn't been all bad.

It's a little easier to sit around for hours waiting for a run when the weather is sooooo nice. Sure, I still get bored, but at least I'm bored outside in the sun VS sitting in that building in the background looking outside at the rain.

I got a special delivery from the Fast'ish Marsupial yesterday. He owed me some $$$$'s for the PMBAR entry, but I got a pleasant, yet demeaning, and still somewhat mysterious surprise in the envelope.

I'm not sure how Thad knew that I needed another El Día de los Muertos skull for the chainstay of the new Meatplow (the MOOTS has one), but perhaps he is just psychic. The Salsa stickers throw me off a little since I have no Salsa products save for a Short and Shallow bar on my road bike which I only bought since I felt like it defined my persona pretty well. I thought the WALZCAPS sticker could be useful since I'm a fan, but it is merely a useless hang tag, so I think Thad wanted to make me throw out his garbage for him one small piece at a time. The four sixes?? I always thought Thad wasn't playing with a full deck, but now I am most certain. Could be some kind of weird blog stalker thing... who knows? And the annotated MOOTS propaganda???

Just Thad's little way of reminding me that his bike is better than mine. I know that Thad. That's why I'm dragging you deep into the woods this May to leave you for the bears and take your bike. Lord knows I've been wanting to get back on to 26" wheels ever since the last time I hit my head really hard on an overhanging branch and lost the ability to think clearly. Not to mention I really want your sponsor...

Bike26.com
ride inferior wheels

One more thing...

When I was at NAHBS nursing a slight hangover in the hotel room Mattycakes tossed me a small black case. As excited as I was at the prospect of some new shades I sighed as I opened it and found yet another pair of improperly colored Tifosi Dolomites. I guess Megan didn't distribute the memo to let everybody know that I really need a pair of pearl white Dolomites to pull off the sharp look I have planned for 2010. Mattycakes, being the gentleman that he is, promptly handled the tense situation in the room, and he let me know that Tifosi may not know how to distribute memos regarding elite athlete's needs, but Tifosi does in fact love moustaches*.

I don't think I can ever get rid of the moustache* now that I have a pair of Tifosi Helo's in Limited Edition gold. I've got a real 70's cop show look going on here, and now all I need is some acting skills and perhaps I could land a role on the next unsuccessful prime time cop drama. These glasses make absolutely no sense in a practical manner on the bike, but I have a lot of Tifosi's on my shelf to handle that... although none of them are white.

* I'm no longer going to use the word "mustache" when referring to my lip broom as I think that "moustache" is a much better way to spell it. My spellcheck hates it, but according to google it is just as acceptable as "mustache", and I think the "o" makes it a little more distinguished. I'm all about being a little more distinguished.

Are you ready? Me neither.

After a week of shit like this...

it was nice to get out for some of this....

BMCC's humorous chainsaw wielding trail crew letting you know that you should have a nice day while riding Warrior Creek.

Last week was officially the time to start riding slightly more in the mornings than I have been since October (maybe even September). Monday and Tuesday I spent some extra time out on the Fastest Bike in the World, but on Wednesday when I left the house it was something like 27°. While I do have clothing to get me well below that temperature I didn't want to wear it since it would fill my bag up rather substantially as the day got warmer making it increasingly difficult to do my job... well that, and I'm just getting sick of riding around in sub freezing temps.

I got up on Wednesday and went back to the site of Run Club Part Duh, the naked guy hang out... The Y. This time I left my running shoes back at the house and hopped on a Spin Bike to get my suffering on. Even though the saddle had a slight tilt downward reducing my comfort factor I hopped on the "bike" closest to the fan to reduce the stink factor since I'd be wearing the same clothes all day. I had so much "fun" that I returned on the following 29° Thursday morning and on the next 28° Friday morning. At least on Thursday I figured out that my Jethro Tool fit the clunky seat adjustment bolt, so I was able to make the bike slightly more rideable 55Nine style (who's riding it like this anyways??).

After a week of no fun riding it was nice to get out in the woods again for the second time in the last eight or nine weeks. I headed up to the Kerr Scott trail system with Bill Nye TSG to ride what I feel is one of the funnest non-Pisgah trails in the Southeast, Warrior Creek. I'm sure some folks would think I was going up there to check out the course, but honestly I've been wanting to get up there all winter long. It's been either soaking wet or under snow since last December, at least on the weekends when I can ride, so it was nice to nab it while I had the chance.

I did see this disturbing image while I was waiting for Bill Nye to grind up the worst of the climbs out there:

It looks like this tree could use a little of That Butt Stuff.

I can't wait for the race. I'm not sure that a month will be enough time to get ready for it... I mean really ready, but whatever. I wasn't about to start riding any earlier in the year, and it's only six hours. The really hard racing doesn't start until May. Speaking of PMBAR Eric "PMBAR Honcho Wever recently announced that the race was full and less than a day later he got permission from the US Forest Service to open the race up from 75 teams to an unprecedented 100 teams. Keeping my what seems to be perennial position of second place just got a little harder in 2010. Sign up now or regret it forever.

Race news and dont's

What's new?

Well the other day I saw somebody reading this book in Starbucks:

Personally I thought it was a bit redundant, I didn't know Twitter was for anyone else. All kidding aside I do see some traffic from twits, tweets, and twoots occasionally, and just the other day one came from here:

http://twitter.com/Transsylvania

And it went a little something like this:

Team Dicky is coming!!! Now its a race!

about 10 hours ago via TweetDeck

Yes, I put my money where my mouth is, and I entered another stage race for 2010 (I already ponied up for the Breck Epic). The official word from headquarters is that the Trans Sylvania is officially a race now that I am on board. Things were looking a bit sketchy beforehand, but it's certainly going to be a media spectacle now that I'm amongst the ranks of the registered. Of course I'll have some stiff competition since Harlan Price is now racing a single speed. Word on the street is that Harlan is either trying to justify some really cool facial hair or he's decided it would be fun to beat up on a bunch of has been, overweight, outta shape, hungover single speeders. I even heard he's getting a single speed oriented tattoo (like a chainring or something else clever) and having Gary Fisher mold a carbon fiber bottle opener to his new Superfly SS frame. Welcome to the dark side Harlan. Have fun talking to The Pflug about whatever it is you elite riders talk about at the front of the field while doing each others nails. I could care less what Harlan does to the SS field at the TS Epic since my only goal is to beat that slacker cum journalist Cush. I know I'm not setting my sights very high, but whatever... the pasty PA wannabe will go down.

Although I am most certainly looking forward to the SOLD OUT 6 Hours of Warrior Creek I was bummed to see yet another conflict rear its ugly head on my calender. Not only has the Pisgah 36 been rescheduled to the same weekend, but now a race that I told myself last year I must do has been scheduled for the day after the 6WC. Yet another fine Chris Scott production, The Dragon's Tale, will be going down on Sunday, April 4th. This new piece of information has set my mind into motion. The 6WC is just a couple hours south of the DT, which means if I get in the car after I take the top step on the single speed podium again (I may be overplanning there) I can make haste to the free campsite and wake up smelling like ass to race another 40 miles in God's country. I race a hundred miles in a day, so what's 110 miles over two days gonna matter? I'm not sure if I'll follow through on this one, but I am certainly not missing my chance at some of this in April:

photo cred Cathie Docherty

Warrior Creek: Wilkesboro's own amusement park ride

The Return of the Return of the Phantom Stranger

There's no doubt in my mind. It's back... the Phantom Stranger just can't stay away. At least I'm catching it early, but then again what difference does it make. I'm already doing everything I can, and it still came anyways.

Even though I've been wearing shoes as opposed to sandals all winter my left pinkie toe has still decided to turn on me.

It's puffy and red and somewhat contorted looking... sorta resembling a simple balloon animal. I can remember the day it crept in through an unlocked back door (the Mustache ride), and I long for the day that it takes its leave.

In a totally unrelated bit of news a concerned citizen felt like it would be a good thing for me to have a Feedback Sports Alping digital hanging scale (with 55lb capacity). As if I needed to have one more thing to play with I believe the perpetrator's purpose was to confound me with yet one more way to fall into the anal abyss that is bike geekdom. It was out of the box and weighing bikes in a matter of minutes. Of course I weighed the new Meatplow first, but I'm saving that for last.

The Fastest Bike in the World

That's none to shabby considering the threaded fork/headset, SPD pedals, wire bead tires, hoopty handlebar, and cheap front wheel. I imagine it gained some weight recently when the SLR saddle broke and I had to replace it with a death bin Flite (not shown). BTW: Why was I keeping a broken railed Flite, a missing railed coverless Flite, and a torn leather cover in the death bin?

Who knows...

How 'bout my clapped out DeBernardi Road bike that I would love to replace with something fancier to hang on my wall?

Twenty pounds even? Not as bad as I thought, but considering I replaced the heavy Shimano 600 8 speed STI shifters with downtube jobbies (that work even though they're 7 speed) and some Cane Creek levers and the fact that the wheels are ultralight climbing wheels that's probably where it should be. Long live single pivot calipers!!! Anyways, that's kinda sad when I compare it to this:


The old titanium Thylacine, built up with a heavy Phil Wood fixed hub, shitty Bontrager front wheel, Misfit bar/stem combo, and some $9 wire bead cross tires. Sad day indeed when it crushes the road bike in the weight department. No wonder I grab this bike as a last resort before I grab the road bike as an even lastier resort.

The Death Stick

Wow. That would be a heavy bike, at least for a single speed hardtail... for me. All that weight comes from the addition of the 5"+ travel fork and two beefy tires (1,400+ grams for the front). I guess it doesn't matter how heavy it is since I built this bike to play in the mountains of NC, and they're gonna be covered with a glacier till 2012 when the world ends.

And the one you've all been waiting for.... The Meatplow:

Hmmm... not quite Fuzzy's 17lb carbon scooter is it? Well when (if??) I get my crabon frok that should drop @ 1.25lbs, so I might just flirt with a sub twenty pound build. That's hot. The scale did verify that my bike would be 30 grams lighter with a 31.6 Thomson post as opposed to the MOOTSpost/drilled out Cane Creek shim as shown, but it would be 15 grams heavier if the shim wasn't drilled out. This scale is going to drive me crazy.

I'm Abbie Normal

My long awaited lab results from my recent blood work are in. I have to say all the numbers, acronyms, and technical terms are pretty confusing to me, so I forwarded them to my race director/team doctor/facial hair stylist Mike Piazza.

Mike Piazza says other than the fact that this information should have been printed to his scale most of what he sees looks good. Last year in June (right before I left for Breckenridge) my hematocrit was that of a sad couch potato, but now (as of February 19th) I'm slightly closer to being a normal adult male... as far as hematocrit goes. Unfortunately there is a lot of (mis)information on the internet regarding normal values when it comes to hematocrit, red blood cell count, hemoglobin, and just about everything else. One website said a hematocrit level of 49% was optimal for adult males, but considering elite cyclists were doping to stay as close to the 50% mark (you were suspended when you hit 51%) I kinda think that number has to be off. Like most folks I search the internet until I find information that makes me feel good, and I did find a few sites that had more attainable numbers, numbers like "for men 39 - 49%". I'm just about in the middle there, so I'm not gonna look into it any further.

Of course not all news was good news. In an attempt to raise my iron levels I jacked up my cholesterol. I used to have amazingly low LDL cholesterol (the bad one), but now I'm at the lower limits of "You'd better watch your diet Mr Dillen". Meh. I can easily identify that culprit, and changes will be made to get my veins flowing freely again. Also I have a slight vitamin D deficiency, but I wonder who doesn't have a vitamin D deficiency this time of year. The human body makes vitamin D when the skin is exposed (5 to 30 minutes of exposure to the skin on your face, arms, back or legs (without sunscreen) twice every week) to the ultraviolet B (UVB) rays in sunlight. I ain't seen the sunshine since I don't know when, so I'm stuck in supplement prison. At least I get to go back in six months to see where I'm at after making yet even more dietary changes and a little sun bathing. Wonder what I'll screw up next.

Race news???

There are only a few (less than ten) spots left for the 2010 PMBAR. If you want in now is your chance.

Hoffencross is back on. April 17th in the Dupont State Forest. There will be no drug testing or French scientists looking for doper/hackers, so bring your syringes and centrifuges for an all out smack down of epic proportions.

What would Riccardo Ricco do?

That's right, I'll be bringing some matches and burning some bridges.

Spring "training" begins in earnest

Friday of last week was the last day for Run Club Part Duh. I had planned to sorta blow myself out with a week of fast running and perhaps attempt a sub 6:00 mile, but my rib injury from the previous Sunday made it hard to breathe. I basically jogged for twenty minutes Monday-Thursday, but by Friday the boredom had taken over. Injury or not I decided to go for the 6:00 mile. I realize this is not necessarily a lofty goal, but it seemed hard enough after a two year running hiatus. After a ten minute warm up I could only pull of a 6:10 mile... not too far off the mark, and not too bad considering my ribs hurt the whole time and kept me from taking full breaths.

Although I had hoped that Run Club Part Duh would help me lose weight (it didn't) at least it made up for all the extra tasties I drank over the winter. I was also doing sit ups and other assorted calisthenics hoping to build some ripped abs. I wasn't necessarily doing it to strengthen my core, but to see if I could build ripped abs in three months. I figured it would be like building a sand castle... you know it's a waste of time since time will wash it away, but you just want to see how cool you can make it. I assure you that under a thin layer of fat there really is a washboard, a totally useless, temporary washboard.

Monday (yesterday) was to be the beginning of actual bike "training". I headed out for 1.5 hours of just riding around before work, not unlike any other "training" ride I might do. I did not enjoy the sub freezing temps one bit, and I missed the warmth of the gym (and the fact that I was only running 20 minutes when I was at the gym). To keep my hands warm I tucked them under my messenger bag from time to time and rode around with my hands off the bars and protected from the wind. After about an hour into the ride it felt like my saddle had shifted to the left. I kept looking down trying to figure out what was going on, but I wouldn't realize it till later on during my work day.

Not picking up what I'm laying down?

I realized that if the other rail would have broke while I was riding around with my hands under my messenger bag I would have been in for quite a treat as the saddle would have gave way and I woulda landed on my rear wheel in a most uncontrollable manner. Probably some face contact with a little fixed gear locked in the pedals confusion for sure. I'm sure it would have looked hilarious to an innocent bystander. I had thought my re-upholstered ti tube railed SLR was gonna last forever. Meh.

Today shoulda been day two of Spring "training", but apparently Mother Nature did not get the memo. 100% chance of mid 30° rain today... not the kind of weather which will inspire me to ride extra miles.

And finally....

There were many things that made NAHBS worth doing...

Yes Peter, there was plenty of fruit to go around. You woulda liked it.
P.S. Dave from MOOTS misses you.