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Friday, January 13

Race or drink beer?

After Wednesday's highly controversial sock post, I was overwhelmed. Had I known I only needed to talk about socks for two days straight to get a massive peep out of the masses, I woulda started Sock Thursdays years ago.

There's some stuff going on here behind the scenes. Things that will be shared with the class at a later point. Stuff that is way bigger than a pair of socks. How bigger? Like two breadboxes bigger.

I'm sure that you've noticed that my new Oh-So-Smart Phone has really raised the bar around here, in a social media sense and as far as upping the quality of the images. I do miss some things about my old Not-So-Smart Phone...

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Last night I fixed that problem... to the power of ten.

Nay, make that to the power of fucking twenty-two.

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I feel complete once more. Friends, call me often if you would please, especially when I'm out in public with my family. They would like that.

Why should I even bother blogging today? My former editor, Karen "Killer B" Brooks (now editor of the esteemed Bicycle Times) wrote a very nice Dicky'esque type blog post, complete with Sponsor Liaison and Equipment Acquisitions Director Admiral Ackbar, David Lee Roth, and Montucky Miller references.

She ends up doing a better job explaining something I tried to explain before but failed. I'm assuming I failed because I did not get 43 comments telling me how awesome my explanation was.

This weekend, the Short Track racing begins here in Charlotte, NC. I wasn't planning on racing, but then I got called out by one of the (former?) pasty white bearded hill people.

Then I thought about it some more, and then even some more after that. I've been racing off and on in this series for close to ten years. The only thing keeping me from racing this weekend is deciding whether or not I'll spend $28 registering for the race or buying two sixers of Happy Ending and a small Domino's pizza.

I should have put a couple PAYPAL donate buttons on my sidebar, one for the short track entry fee and one for beer and pizza. Whichever one would hit $30 first would win for the weekend.

My hindsight is bionic.

12 comments:

AdamB said...

Just sell a pair or two of those bionic socks and you can afford to drink beer after you race. 8>}

wv = sorys

Joe Dirt said...

So I bought the Awesome strap/whammer dealio, all the pics I have seen show a bare ass CO2 cartridge tucked in there with a tube, what are you guys using to inflate should the need arise? I currently have a CO2 inflator with a plastic case around the cartridge with tire lever attached. It seems too bulky with a 29er tube. Maybe I need to practice my tube origami.

Anonymous said...

Drink and ride pussy

dicky said...

I use a thread on inflator (like the Microflate from Genuine Innovations). I usually carry it in my Tulbag. I did have it threaded on the cartridge and strapped to my bike for over a year once, and it worked fine. I've seen people stick the larger inflators in a strap, and it can take some figuring. What strap are you using and where are you sticking it?

Joe Dirt said...

I stick it where the sun don't shine under my seat. I can't fit a 29er tube, inflator and a multi tool in the Awesome Strap Race. I'm sure that's more than what's intended. I can get a tube and the inflator in there and it looks OK, seems stable. I'll just carry the rest in the Tulbag/jersey pocket. What about tube origami?

dicky said...

I purge all the air out, bind the tube with rubber bands made from old tubes, and voila. Sounds like I need to do a tutorial. Do you have the latest Race with longer straps or an older model? Curious...

Joe Dirt said...

My straps are long (just got it a few weeks back based on your praise). I seem to have an issue where the valve ends up, worried about it rubbing through the tube. With a tube, my CO2 inflator and a multi tool the resulting package is huge and unsightly (just like my other package).

dicky said...

Ahhh.... I'd like to see how big your tool is. You should leave the cap on the stem and fold it into the tube first.

ssjohn said...

You guys are like a bunch of kids comparing their slap bracelets. "Here, hold out your tube and let me wrap one of these things around it. Oh man, mine's not big enough for my wrist, uh, I mean inflator." Of course, this is just jealousy speaking because I do not own an awesome strap of my own.

By the way, slap bracelets were sold under the brand name "Slap Wrap". Sounds like a street name for a condom. Thanks Wikipedia.

Anonymous said...

SOX...SMOCKS....YOUR BALLS STINK AND YOUR ON E!

Moonshine said...

Bionic hindsight is the shiz...

I run 2 16g carts, a 29er tube, and tire levers in an Awesome Strap Race under a Brooks B17 boat anchor and it works great. The Genuine Innovations inflator rides along with my Park minitool kit and extra methamphetamines in my Tulbag. Hopefully Master Dicky approves!

Anonymous said...

we can make him better than he was...