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Friday, April 11

Practical VS Impractical Vanity

I have a degree in art education.  I was forced to attend many classes in college that I didn't want to take in order to make me a well rounded art educator.  I was signed up for weaving before it was canceled.  I ended up taking jewelry.  Really.

Many classes stuck with me.  Graphic design (which didn't use computers back then... what's a register mark?).  Printing.  Painting.

I think I spent the better part of an entire quarter exploring different shades of gray... there are more than fifty.

I imagine that my experience in college (after two years of heavy science and math helped me remember that I wanted the job I wanted after college, not the ones that were in "demand") is one of the reasons I scrutinize so many irrelevant matters when it comes to building a bike.  Symmetry.  Eye-pleasing cable routing.  I'd rather pull off a misapplied decal and ruin it rather than stare at it for five years in a slightly askew state.*

The red aluminum slider adjuster bolts.  Why replace the stock steel ones?  I am convinced that the ultra-long and sorta heavy steel stock bolts, when ran in their shorter settings, can vibrate out.  Thus I replaced them with lighter (less inertia at the head) and shorter (less leverage at the threads) bolts.  Red?  Because of the red on the Eriksen post.

Which sends me down a wormhole of trying to tie everything together.  Not so much in the respect of matchy-matchy, but for artistic balance.

I've been using side-loading cages for years now due to my frames being built to my four apple size.  They are made of a hi-tech material called "plastic."  Regular bottle cage bolts sink deep into the holes with any kind of torque and do quelle dommage.  I used to utilize thin steel washers, but while I was ordering red aluminum slider adjuster bolts (three pairs of different lengths to cover all bases including 29+ possibilities), I thought, "Why not?"

Low profile, big head... just like me.  Relatively cheap when compared to a two liter bottle of soda (not at sale price).

Those help tie in these:

The Big Red S designed (made by DT Swiss) skewers are no longer available, and I'm fortunate to have them.  They are what I wanted for why I wanted them, and if I tried to explain the reasoning, I'm sure you would think I'd really gone off the deep end.  Safe to say, I have.

Of course, when I had to order a bottom bracket for the new cranks, I went Enduro™.

Red being an option, it became the only logical non-option.

This all set me up for a troubling result.  Just like in the cockpit of Asiana Flight 214, there was Sum Ting Wong.

Off-balance.  The dark hunk of crabon threw things off.  I had to do something or my lustful looks across the way at my bike would be thrown off by this virtual zit on the Mona Lisa of the bike room.

But to "fix" it was a sure sign of vanity.  I "needed" the bolts and the bottom bracket that I purchased.  Without skewers, my wheels would fall off.  I already had everything I needed, but all that stood between me and perfection was my desire to save my wages for eventual retirement.  I made the call.

Sean's homemade 16mm Allen tool coming in way more handy than I woulda ever imagined.

There is now peace in the world (at least in my corner of the 28211).  The bike is visually balanced, although mine eye is drawn to this on every ride:

I'm using the top cap from a Cane Creek AER headset.  I'm used to seeing the AER with a gold bolt.

This plain Jane raw aluminum bolt drives me nuts.  Nuts enough to regret not putting a gold bolt in the cart when I was buying all those other much needed binders, but not enough for me to pay all the postage and handling for one bolt...

This is the life I live inside my head.  Your welcome to it.

* Who am I kidding?  Keep a bike for five years?  Who does that?

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Pink wheels with red accents?

John Parker said...

I think its time for some ti h2o cages....

but the red crank bolts are a nice touch.

dicky said...

Pink wheels and red accents? Yes.

I just got the red crank puller/extractors. The bolts are still black and that was on purpose. My aesthetic preferences decided red extractors and bolts would be too much red down there.

Anonymous said...

isnt the slider bolt thread the same as the top cap. like more red dude.

dicky said...

Nah, 4mm Allen head VS 5mm Allen head (M5 & M6).

M standing for "Meh."

The Greatest Show on Dirt said...

I'm so happy I'm not the only person with this sort of mental sickness. Unfortunately, I'm too broke/cheap to treat it.

wrepsher said...

Aluminum slider bolts but you retain the heavy brass jam nuts? Nevermind that the brass doesn't match anything else...unless you get that gold top cap bolt.

dicky said...

Exactly why I need the gold top cap bolt.

Anonymous said...

Nice Thylacine!

Anonymous said...

You reached the pinnacle of anal retentivness long ago..time to move on to anal retention and focus on holding as much stuff as possible, as long as possible, inside your butthole.