Wednesday, September 23

I don't know what to do with my hands: Part 7

I mentioned that my goal for 2015 was to throw up the sign of the devil (dude) on every podium I managed to sneak onto (in a deserving manner).

How did I do?

3: empty handed, no hand gestures

2: two-fisted beer salutes

1: double handed horns... also the only one with a podium HAT (not cap)

1: beer in one hand, other in pocket

1: horns up, beer in other hand

Three for eight, unless the double horns counts as two.  That's pretty terrible.

Also of note, I wore my Born to Kill cap on five podiums, making it the most best piece of podium gear (aside from my late in the season acquisition of Nick's green jorts).  No, you can not get one, because Idiom Sweatshop stopped making them.

Assuming I can ever make another podium in 2016 (or later), I'm gonna try to stick with the plan.  The standard "hands up, don't shoot" and the Olympic Black Power salute are tired at best.  I also don't want to come up with some original pose that I'd need to recreate time and again.   Sounds awful. 

Throwing horns.  Sure it's played out, but there is none more metal thing one can do with their finger parts.

Except for maybe punching your rivals in the dick with a Dale's Stovepipe

All that said, I might still find myself racing once or twice more in 2015.  I'm not in the mood for Double Dare (I like to sleep too much), but Single Dare?

What is that?

It's just like PMBAR, you know, that race that sells out every year in nanoseconds.  Teams of two riders, only $60, starting at 10:00AM trying to get at least 4 outta 5 checkpoints.

Except this is in October.  And you will more than likely be out after dark... no matter how fast you are.  And the awesome seasonal trails will be open.  And you don't have to worry about lodging since you can camp at the start/finish... with the added bonus of watching all the Double Dare participants staring glassy-eyed off into the distance.

I've still gotta figure out if I'm "racing" or not.  Since I have a free pass from Friday to Sunday, I might end up at the Warriors Team Scavenger Hunt and Gold Sprints at the Spoke Easy the night before Single Dare.  I'm not sure if I can keep my shit straight for that long of a duration without supervision.  Even if I end up going too hard in the paint at The Spoke Easy, I'm still planning on being in Pisgah that weekend, making some sort of impact on all the fun going on.  I must.  It's a moral imperative that I be there.

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