Internothing

Over the weekend, my social media started lighting up with personal Interbike related stuff. 

"I'm going... "

"I'm not going, but I hate it anyways."

"I'm not going, but wish I was."

"I'm going, and I hate everything and everybody."

Those sort of posts.  For a moment, I thought, "Maybe I should hit up The Boy for some non-rev airfare... go play with Watts in the desert."

We had talked about it, but then, that's how it goes.  I also talked to Cush months ago about doing something for Dirt Rag... but that's also how that goes.  More spit-balling out loud, thoughts and ideas bandied about, things you think might happen but deep down know never will.

I have no business out there.  Never did.  I only want a do-over of my 2011 experience. 

It's been that long?

I failed at my first and only Interbike.  I didn't go to Dirt Demo.  I missed most of the racing at Cross Vegas.  I managed to not go to any of the parties that happened when everything shut down for the evening, although I never missed the short window for free alcohol during Interbike hours.  My last night ended in front of Walgreens with a stomach full of buffet food and a six pack that I couldn't fit in my esophagus.

What did I get to do?  Wander around, talk to people while standing in the aisles until my back hurt, look up Mike Ferrentino's nose...

At least I got that part right.

It was a great chance to catch up with people that I don't normally see unless we're racing bicycles, even though I was terribly under-dressed for the Ergon Formal Ball. 

I would bring my pants if I went back in case I ended up at something where adult men cover their lower legs.   Someday, those pants I bought are gonna come in handy.

Not really.  I just keep telling myself that to avoid coming to terms with my buyer's remorse.  Who buys pants?  People like Donald Trump buy pants.  That's who.

I kinda sorta wished I could be there for the Outdoor Demo.  Could save me a lot of money if I rode full suspension bikes for three days, discovered that they aren't all that... or that they are and I need one because I'm elderly.  Who knows? 

Of course at some point, I realized a couple things:

1. I don't want to burn up that much PTO to be at Interbike all week, which is what I'd want to do in order to get the Dirt Demo thing checked off my list AND actually make the rounds with Watts at all the important social events (because he's pretty much the Ryan Seacrest of The Industry).

2. I just signed up for a race that happens to be this Saturday... which reminded me of one of the reasons I waited so long to register... because I thought I was leaving myself open in case Interbike fell in my lap.

But it didn't.

So I will wait a few months and read about it all on the Watts blog, assuming he gets to the point and talks about the actual events and stories.  Which he probably won't.

Probably meaning actually.

It will all be over in less than a week, and then my FOMI (Fear of Missing Interbike) will subside... until next year... when poor planning and terrible execution and follow-through will produce the same result.