'21 Trans-Sylvania Epic: Stage Two

Forgot to mention that all the images you'll see for the most part are thanks to the TSE Media Team.  They're a dedicated crew that works tirelessly and will also chase you down and beat you with a telephoto lens if you refuse to smile.

I thought after Stage One finished, I was in for a quiet evening.  I spent loads of time in the squeezy bags and getting plenty of quality food into my pie hole.  I'd only cracked a couple beers open before I decided it was getting pretty close to bed time when I heard that laugh.  Seth Rogen'esque.

I know it's Josh Kunz.  He's found me.  My world will change now.  He brought a half pony keg of Space Dust and a full keg of youthful enthusiasm.  He was only doing the three day race but came in early to hang out and volunteer before throwing down.  So outta my bunk and into the kitchen shooting the proverbial shit until 11:30.

I wake up the next day and people are already wearing kits.  Jeebus.  Am I late?  Panic for a hot minute and then realize I've still got way over an hour to get ready.  10:00 starts are soooooo nice.

Line up a couple rows back from the front...

and I find myself talking to Ohio SS'er Kenny about power meters?

Apparently, not only do we have two full suspension single speeds in our mix (Dahn corrected me, it's three), we also have multiple power meters amongst uSS.  I felt like I'd finally jumped up three levels (five years too late) when I got my Wahoo Elemnt Bolt in 2019, and now I'm off the back again.  He explained how to use things like FTP to meter your efforts on long climbs, and all I could think was "that makes sense."  Froome staring at stems won a lot of Tour de Frances.  Here I am, the only one still stupid enough to "race" TSE on a rigid single speed thinking all I need is a dropper, a simple computer, and old man stubbornness?

The race starts and I'd already convinced myself this was the stage with too much rolling gravel outta the gate (that's actually Stage Four), so I find myself dropping back as the geared riders roll past... to enter the first real descent realizing I was wrong about which stage is which.  I had just let a single speeder past me, and he could not go as fast as I could, so I was just stymied.  My fault for not paying attention. 

What followed was a strange dark place.  Later on, other riders would point out just how hot it was.  Me being unable to pinpoint the source of my sorrows, I just felt like a black hole of self-pity.  Feelings of "why do I do this?" overwhelming my brain parts.  After a long hike-a-bike (that I remember being able to ride years ago), I pop out on the gravel road.  There's a guy with a backpack wearing a Knobby Side Down jersey standing at the side of the road.

"Need anything?"

"I'm good."

"You want a cold beer?"

"Ummmm... unnhhh... that's all I want right now."

So stand there and finish my beer and ignore the world going past me. 

I head into Sassafras to Pig Pile... and this whole thing is ringing some bells.  I member.  Down the insane chute that is Pig Pile and I roll right up on the SS'er I got stuck behind on the first descent of the day.  I make as much noise as possible, and on the sketchy steep right hander, he lets me go.

Hot and also diggity.

He gets past me when things start going up again and then we catch Worboy and Kranz, and I'm all WTF?  I guess this stage is getting to some other people.  It's not just me feeling like I'm permanently residing in the pain cave.  We hit the final descent down the No Name trail (No Name is a name tho, right?)... and I member it well.  On a rigid bike, you really need to let the bike go a bit to stay outta the chunky holes, but when I catch up to the same guy (again), he's not so keen to let me get around... so I end up painfully plunking down into all the holes.

We get to the final climb up Stillhouse, and he starts making the mashed potatoes.  I, on the other hand, am looking at being close to my max heart rate just trying to stay on the bike.  I can member "attacking" here in years past gunning for a stage win, and now I'm just trying to move forward.  We pass one of the full suspension SS'ers, but I can't even come close to closing this gap to my DH nemesis.

And then to rub salt in the wound, when we get on the last trail that I've been on a billionty times right next to camp, I let three geared riders come by... and two of them were 50+ and they finished 3 and 4 on the day.  Dammit.

And even tho I finished in front of three SS guys who bested me on day one, I only finished one place higher than the day before.

And at a great cost.

Was touching to see the Ohio flag flying high above the PA scout camp tho.