Content(ment) Creator

Huh.  Would you look at that?  Everyone complaining about the time change makes me feel less like adding to the clamor of overwhelming disappoint.  I get it.  You wake up.  It's dark.  You go to work, come home, and it's dark.  Then the weekend comes, and when you blink your eyes while standing in the cereal aisle at Target, it's gone.

Mondays just last a whole week now until sometime in mid-March.

Commence ramble.

I saw the trainer stowed away in the spare room closet when I was moving the puffy coats to the main closet in the hall on Sunday.  It looked up at me from the dusty, dark corner as if to say, "we're gonna do this again, aren't we raggedy man?"

I mean, I don't wanna.  Really, I don't.

Move the coats to the hall closet.  Move the coats back to the spare room closet.  Repeat ad infinitum. 
What are the goals in life that we all share beyond finding true contentment?  Contentedness might be a nice feeling after suffering through a protracted ordeal and finally getting to the light at the end of the tunnel, but it's probably not the state you want to live the rest of your life in until death.  Kinda like Alabama. 

I woulda said Ohio (but I got family and frands there), Arkansas (but Bentonville), or mebbe North Dakota (but.... ?)

yeah, how about North Dakota then?

I guess that's the main reason I try to throw a stage race or two into my "season" every year.  It narrows my focus down in the lead up as I attempt to prepare my neglected body for a week of suffering.  The months before are filled with sweating over packing lists of spare parts and wardrobe changes and waking up from anxiety-riddled fever dreams.  The day-to-day of being at the event is consumed with the sense that I need to get to the end of the week in one piece.  The seconds, minutes, and hours of trudging forward from the start to the finish each day knowing that it will feel so "worth it" when it's all done and dusted.

I'm fortunate* that 95% of my "struggles" are self-fabricated issues.  I find myself at the bottom of a steep gravel road climb because I just rode down a magical ribbon of dirt through the trees and over the chunder gnar.  I wake up bleary eyed because I cracked a final triumphant celebration of another day above the ground beer at 9:20PM.  I want to lose weight because I allowed myself to look away from the scale for a few too many months whilst eating the random leftovers that show up at work all too frequently that I can accommodate within the terms of my Everest Diet plan.

"Because it's there."

I have one problem.  Although I despise problems, I love problem solving.  I'm Schrödinger's Dick in a  Box.  That said, I don't think I'll find myself stacking any more Tetris blocks or finishing another Sudoku puzzle any time soon.  See above image to see how that always turns out.

I'm optimistic that 2024 will be a better than average year. Still, not so confident that I didn't place one final order with Maxxis before submitting my sponsorship application for next "season."

What can I say?  I recognize that all good things must come to an eventual end, so why not be both the cricket and the ant?  This blerhg spits and sputters along, and my desire to create "content" wanes as I lose interest in making my life appear to be anything more marvelous than completely average**. 

le sigh

I think I'll plan on going outside tomorrow to stare at the sun for the fifteen minutes that it's actually visible in the sky.

* I always remind myself that "bored" is a privilege.

** It's actually much better than average, but I don't wanna be to braggadocios except in the footnotes that no one will read.