Grumpy (small) Old Man

Generally speaking, I don't understand the concept of taking selfies.  I mean, I guess I get the self-edification of one's outward image, but wouldn't life be easier if we all just traveled with selfless, professional photographers?

Case in point:

As a GORE Wear ambassador, I'm sort of expected to do more than make public appearances sporting their apparel.  Pretty sure hash tags are important, but that's probably the number two thing on the list of things that I'm terrible at doing.  Honestly, they're not entirely clear about what I'm supposed to do, but I keep doing it, and things keep showing up.  It certainly seems like a positive feedback loop that I'm in currently.

So there I am delivering an envelope to the RNC the other day, and I realize this is possibly one of the only times I'm going to feel good about snapping a picture of me wearing my GORE® R7 GORE-TEX SHAKEDRY™ Trail Hooded Jacket.  I've lost two personal iPhones to rain-related damages, so the idea of whipping my current functioning phone out to get selfie of me riding in the pouring rain isn't even a half bueno.  The best I can muster is this reflection in an elevator door waiting for my ride up to the 17th floor on a rainy morning.  It would be so much easier to be this guy (who obvs has his own selfless, professional photographer):

I've written about the Shake Dry™ technology before.  Over the year and a half, I've been relying on a Shake Dry™ full-zip jacket...

and a hooded half-zip jacket.

I don't know how to say anything short of the fact that they've been life-savers.  I've experienced some absolute dismal conditions at Breck Epic, PMBAR, Bootlegger, etc.  They both pack down super small and are waterproof and windproof.  The cut is oh-so athletic, saving me from all the flappy arm business in the wind.  That said, when I'm wearing these jackets at work, they have a little trouble accommodating the many layers I'd be wearing if the temperature drops below 40°.  Seriously, rain at those temperatures is miserable, and I'll put as many layers on as I reasonably can.  Only problem being that my arms and torso start looking like over-stuffed, GORE-TEX encased sausages.

This jacket tho...

The GORE TEX membrane on the OUTSIDE of the jacket means water will always bead and run off, like forever.

My other Shake Dry™ jackets are as minimalist as possible, making them extremely packable, but less versatile.  This jacket has a more ample fit (that lets me look like a normal person at work), and has a few more features.

* The other jackets are not recommended for use with backpacks, but the R7 Trail is abrasion and tear resistant, so it can be used with a pack... which is great considering that I'm making a living wearing one.

* The hood still fits under my helmet (like the lighter jacket), but it also has a drawcord to adjust the fit and a visor to help keep the rain off my glasses.

* There's a drawcord at the waist to keep the fit snug when it's cold, and the main zipper can be unzipped from the bottom to allow for some extra airflow when it's not so cold (but still sadly moist).

* The slightly bulkier jacket still fits in its own Napoleon zippered chest pocket for storage.  "Bulkier" than the minimalist jackets while being way less of a $12 sized burrito shape of a traditional three layer rain jacket.

In short, its more versatile than the previous jackets I've tried.   I still feel like they all have their place in my "jacket quiver."  Full-zip/no hood for warm and moist, half-zip/hooded for "shit goes down, better be ready" race/epic ride conditions or the R7 Trail for work, commuting, or just standing around in the rain possibly staring up at my gutters to make sure they're guttering or mebbe tossing rip rap around in my backyard trying to save it from being washed away.

That is my backyard washing through my side yard down the driveway and into the street.  That is also my HVAC unit trying to not be a canoe.

Tell me that I'm spoiled, and I'll take it.  I've been bike commuting since the late '80s and making my living on a bike since '96, so I've paid my dues.  I can remember riding to class at Youngstown State University wearing a Baja as a rain coat because it took awhile in a decent rain for it to soak all the way through (and even longer for it to dry out).  I've endured generations of bulky rain jackets that did little more than postpone the inevitable soakening, and also the cycling specific, non-breathable jackets that resembled cut up and pieced back together bits of shower curtains.

I've been soaked to the bone, shivering uncontrollably with hands that feel like blocks of ice.  I've also been coated in freezing rain.  I've put in my time, and now I truly am blessed.

I'm also old.  I'm also also grumpy.

These jackets make me less so.

Still here?

Watch this video on Global Mountain Bike Network and see how the sausage is made.