Monday, June 29

I've got perfect balance

So en route to completing a delivery quite some time ago I belled up Industry Nine:

Hello, Industry Nine. This is Brandi.

Hey Brandi, Rich Dillen...

*sigh* Yes, Rich?

Hey, I was checking out Harlan's high zoot wheels* when I was out at Dirt, Sweat, and Gears. Pretty sweet how you guys managed to trim a lot of weight to produce a race ready, super-light wheel.


Well I was wondering if you guys could hook me up with some super light wheels?

Well Rich, you deserve it more than anybody else. Send in your stuff, and we'll hook it up.

So I got my new wheels on Friday, and within moments of opening the box I was on the horn with Industry Nine again:

Hello, Industry Nine. This is Jeff.

Hey Jeff, Rich Dillen

*sigh* Yes, Rich?

Why do you guys always sigh when I say it's me? Ahhhh, doesn't matter. I got my wheels, and they're not quite right.

Whaddaya mean?

Well they're just not what Brandi and I talked about.

What's wrong with them? Brandi told me you wanted super white wheels, and that's what you got.


All right, those conversations never took place, but it would have made a better story than the truth.

In actuality I decided I wanted to swap the front Stan's 355 out for a Flow. I think either I could feel the front wheel flex (unlikely) or the 2.35 Rampage squirm on the narrow rim at the low pressures I like to run (more than likely). When I stopped by the Industry Nine headquarters on my way to DSG I was planning on picking up a Flow rim and the right length spokes to make the swap. While I was there Jeff showed me the new white rims, and I knew they would probably take my bike to eleven. Jeff said "More like twelve", and it was a done deal.

Well the Flows came in stock last week, so my wheels came apart, hubs and spokes were sent through time and space, and the end result is perfection... in the most loud, God awful, and certainly sinister way.

The rear was swapped out to an Arch rim. Yeah, it weighs more than a 355, but with some stage races coming up in some harsh terrain it seemed like it was worth the small weight penalty. All in all my "race wheelset (white Arch/Flow combo) weighs in somewhere around 20 grams lighter than my old wheelset (black Flows front and rear), but they produce 85% more fjear just looking at them, so while they are not much faster they do slow the competition down a bit.

Last night I watched Vision Quest. Seemed like a good movie to watch before I head off to Colorado. Louden Swain had to lose 23 pounds to fight Shute, and I was trying to lose 10 pounds before the Breck Epic. He had lofty, seemingly unattainable goals, and I too have lofty, seemingly unattainable goals. He liked to sniff women's underwear, and I... well I'm forty years old, and I've already smelled my fair share. There were more important things to think about though...

Is Charlie Hayes my Shute?

Is Peter my Kooch?

Who knows. Doesn't matter. I'm not gonna have Journey, Foreigner, or Madonna providing a soundtrack to my story, so who would watch it anyways?

Hey TSA Agent Man, leave my MOOTS alone.

*Harlan loves his wheels and his bike. He talks about them all the time. If you wanna see Harlan talking about his bike click over and watch him. It's quite fascinating. I just look into his eyes and melt as his voice trickles into my ears.


Joshua Stamper said...


Anonymous said...

How is that weight thing comming anyhow? You leavin' us hangin' on purpose or just trying to forget the whole effort?

Peter Keiller said...

I have dropped 8lbs.
My bike near 5lbs.

I promise to kill you last Dick...onna counta I'll need a ride to the airport.

Unibiker said...

OK, That first part of the blog was a hoot. Maybe you should look in to writing kids books.
So whats with the weight weenie gibberish? You are pushing in to the supermodels class as it is. Save your self before it's too late! Put some cheese on that vegie burger!

Anonymous said...

it seems that 1 meal/day and an assortment of prescription drugs could get you down to 125# in a jiffy...

George said...

For some reason, the white rims on your MOOTS! look nicer than mine. Maybe it's the pretty colors the rest of the wheels are.