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Thursday, July 19

Did-did-did-did you see the frightened ones?

Three more days until The Most Important Race on the International Cycling Calender, and I'm rolling at it like a freight train... that has tragically gone off the rails. Last night with The Pie at yoga class, I had the opportunity to get in some extra miles... on the way to The Spoke Easy to help them finish off the leftover beer from Friday's Zombie Alleycat. Things are not going as planned since I returned from Idaho. I was going to stay away from beer for two weeks to let my system dry out. When I got home from the STDD Remedy trip I saw that there was beer that needed to be dispatched before I started the process. Then the next night I ended up at a Roger Water's concert (BTW: the whole score of the wall can be heard here just as heard in the movie WITHOUT some of the better songs removed as on the released soundtrack).

Well then there was a trip to the grocery store where I treated myself to a onesie and then I just gave in a bought a sixer the other night... so yeah, that didn't pan out.

Normally Blue Ridge Adventures has a list of pre-registered riders published, and that gives me some targets for my pre-event blog fodder. I guess I'll just have to hope that Geoffrey "I get lost in Pisgah even though I'm a pasty white bearded hill person" Bergmark (AKA Geoffrey "The FBI is watching you... masturbate" Bergmark) will be there so I can give him another view of my ass.

Will Black will not be there as he has moved back to Texas. Something about finally being driven out of town by the continuing backlash from the 2008 Waterbottlegate affair.

I'm going into the race with a wishy-washy approach anyhow. I won my single race for 2012, so getting to that top step on the podium at ORAMM isn't really something I feel compelled to strive for this year. I do want to break 5:30, but I'm not sure that's reasonable. Looking back at the results trying to figure out what I can from the single speed times of the past, I figured Will Black woulda set the course SS record back in 2010 when he took the "W."

Not Will Black

I thought Will set a benchmark time of 5:44, but that was not faster than my 2007 time of 5:40, my best ORAMM ever... or so I thought. Last year I came in 5:38:36, but that was second to Robert Jameson's 5:34:50.

Not Robert Jameson

I guess that would be the SS course record now. FYI: 5:40 would get you a 9th overall in 2007 while a 5:34 was only good for 16th last year, just to show you that the big boys are getting faster and more numerous.

I haven't crunched that many numbers since I took an "incomplete" in Calculus II in 1989.

So yeah, 5:29:59 or bust... bust being the more likely option of the two.

Speaking of big boys...

Jebediah Bisquick will be returning to The Most Important Race on the International Cycling Calender. Last time he showed up, he won. His presence would explain this recent email I received:

Jebediah insists on tight security at any event he attends. I guess my plan to have Cameron Chambers run my number plate and dominate the race while I sleep under a shade tree down by the river waiting to take the top spot on the overall podium is now a wash. In hindsight, I shouldn't have agreed to pay him in advance.

If I wanted to win, I am certainly running out of options.

Maybe I should consider some Tour de France tactics...

Do they come in packs of 28?*



*You had to be there.

2 comments:

AdamB said...

Anyone who runs tubeless & sealant knows that a measly little TDF Tack is like a gnat to an elephant. But if it makes you feel better... or more French...

Watts said...

The other night I had my first ORAMM anxiety dream. I'd forgotten to install a crank set on the bike and was in the line up puzzling out the mechanics of the pending ride. Your presence in the dream quelled the anxiety, however, as you had started early that morning and were officially too drunk to race by start time. You rolled up, sans front wheel and as you toppled over, (backwards, oddly enough) you took out some fellow racers. I thought... "Crank or no crank... things are looking up." Then I gave up 20 meters in (the no crank thing wasn't working) and we just drank beer in "the lodge(?)" while our children road tricycles. For reals.