Friday, April 19

Enter me like a criminal

One of my long term training plans for the Trans-Sylvania Epic ended tragically yesterday.

In the works since February, I lost my shit yesterday morning minutes before walking out the door and shaved it off.  The original plan was to curate some decent facial hair to intimidate the rest of the single speed class since I have no tattoos or oddly placed piercings to put fjear in their hjearts.

But I couldn't make it stick.

When I have facial hair, I have a tendency to fiddle with it... incessantly.  Annoyingly.  I can't stop touching it.

With my Viking's disease lumps, I was so busy palping, twisting, fondling, rubbing, and stroking my two anomalies, I wasn't getting anything done.  So now I have one less thing to anally compulse about while I'm awake.

I got a first ride on the new Misfit diSSent Brontoawesomeous Meatplow V.5 set-up.  The Ikon 2.35 did not disappoint.  I ran it down to 17PSI and it was stellar in dry conditions.  I still have my concerns about riding in slop or semi-slop with these low profile knobs.
We shall see.

The ESI grips?

They were gold... errr white with an angelic aura about them.

What can I say?  I wish I hadn't written these off years ago due to a bad experience.  What had happened before?

I won a set of Chunkies years ago.  They went on my messenger bike.  They were too big.  I ran them anyways.  Once, after a few days of continuous rain (my bike being outside for @ten hours a day back then), one of the grips started to slip on one end.  I swapped the grips out.

The grips are still on one of my shelves.  One is still on the bars, the other is sitting Hans Solo next to a bunch of cans of spray paint.  Upon recent inspection, I noticed that the end of the grip had some damage, perhaps from an errant parking job or a spill.  Either way, I'm guessing some water snuck in under the grip at the point of damage.

That's my guess anyways.


The Racer's Edge feels spot on.  Thin enough for my tiny hands (which allude to no other anatomical size issues) but with just the right amount of squish for some comfort.  The touch, the feel, the ride quality...  What else can I say?

Other than the fact that I am impatiently waiting for the Thomson Drooper to drop, I am also anxiously waiting for these to be available:

photo from MTBR

The new Enduro and Gravity rims from Industry Nine.  These were not (and are still not) available when I built up my SS Torch wheelset, but when they do show up...

I can't decide which one of the new wide rims I'm mounting up front, but it will be one of them.  I can't remember the inner widths, but I do know this is gonna add @ 1/4lb of rotating weight to my wheelzors.  Whatever.  Volume... it's all about volume...

insert dated pop-culture reference here:
Hopefully they show up in time before I ride all up in the "ill-shaped fuck-faced rocks" (Peter Keiller™ ) of the TSE.


John Parker said...

forget the chin...I think there still should be time to craft so long chops in honor of your soccer coaching twin Paolo Di Canino

Anonymous said...

There's always fake red beard, my friend.

Anonymous said...

Some peculiar manscaping might strike fear in the hearts of your competitors...