Monday, April 18

Kangalangamangus's very bad but also very good day

So, no real plan going into the weekend on Friday morning.  I had considered heading down to Columbia, SC for the Harbison 100(k).  I don't think I've ever ridden there, so I figured the first few 12.something miles laps would be pleasant.  The rest, hell.  The only things keeping me from going were doubts about my shoulder, the small field registered for a first year event (lonely riding), and the fact that I was ill-prepared.  Only recently, it dawned on me to re-up my supplies of Carborocket, which ironically showed up in the mail on Saturday afternoon.

Fate or whatever, I guess.  Still the best thing for me to keep nutrition/hydration simple stupid.  Events in the 2-5 hour range... I can just put a bottle of this down every hour and nothing else.

I also considered doing a short rip at the Backyard Trails while The Pie got a massage on Saturday and then on Sunday, doing the long single speed slog to the Whitewater Center, riding all the trails, and coming home totally spent. 

But then I got an email from Kangalangmangus saying that he was heading to Pisgah to ride with April for her birthday happies.  I remembered my desire to get back to back weekends on 27.5+ and 29" wheels to see if I could decide what handles Pisgah terrain better.  This made sense.

Up early, ride uptown, meet Kangalangmangus and Nick "Dip 'n Spray" Barlow, stop on the way to get April a cake and Nick something made out of potatoes.

Meet up with April and Colin in the woods and suit up in our super hero outfits.

Commence with the riding.  Up Wash Creek and over to Bear Branch to hit the first descent and let Colin get the wrecking out of his system for the day.

Colin going all CSI trying to figure out how this log appeared from out of nowhere.

After that, we were (almost) wreck-free for the day.  Spencer Branch, Middle Fork, Fletcher Creek, and one more jaunt up Wash Creek Road to finish with Trace Ridge.

Birthday girl April.

The man who's email saved me from having to make my own decisions, Kangalangmangus.

Serious Nick is serious.  He's partnering up with my PMBAR teammate for the last five years, Zac.  I made sure to give him fake names for every trail we rode.
Yeth, Nick.  This trail really is named Abe Lincoln's Dildo.  I swear.

My bike.  Just being my bike and stuff... leaning against other stuff.

On the way up Wash Creek Road for the second time, Kangalangmangus was running low on steam.  He grabbed the car key and headed back.  Everyone else seemed a bit spent as well (a great indicator for all of us doing PMBAR in three weeks), but we pushed on to bag one more descent for the day.

Back at the vehicle, Kangalangmangus was waiting for us.  Not only did he bail, he somehow lost his chain.  By "lost," I mean he came back with one piece of it.  Not one link.  Just one plate.  That's all he could find.

Break out the cake and post-ride refreshments... after Nick removed a tick from his leg.

The ticks, were like, everywhere.  April's yellow Honda Fit was covered.  This is a bad sign for the coming summer, me thinks.

Faster Cakestache.

Just around the house on Sundays tho.

On the way home, Kangalangmangus whipped into a Burger King drive thru.  Before I had a chance to even look at the options, he excitedly shouts "three Angry Whoppers" into the speaker thing and pulls around to the window.  Next thing you know, he's telling the cashier that he works for Burger King and that everything that's happening is being video recorded.

And then a forty pound bag of this is handed to us and we drive away.

I can't say it was bad.  I also can't say that I didn't finish Kangalangmangus's Angry Whopper when I found the remnants in the wrapper tossed aside.  No Angry Whopper wasted.


Anonymous said...

Was your poop read?

Flame Broiled said...

More like brownish/red with sprinkled with seed..doo doo brown starfish

Anonymous said...

FYI, don't burn off ticks. they'll puke their stomach contents back into you before detaching. nasty little fucks all around.

Anonymous said...

I can dig/appreciate the cake decoration! Very Picasso like "stroke" he has there!

uncle lyme said...

best thing for tick detaching is to underside it with a twisting motion using a q great..back it out everytime.

Anonymous said...

Why you always pickin' on Jesus and Christians? Go after islam and mooselims. Or are you too chicken shit?

April said...

For the record I was actually feeling good all day which is a good sign for PMBAR. Thank you K for the cake and D for the decorating! Loved riding with you all

Anonymous said...

Today's post made me pee my pants.....funny all around!

Anonymous said... what is the verdict on the wheels?