Monday, March 19

You don't no me

A few weeks ago, I got a really sweet negative comment.  Man, it's been awhile.  So refreshing.

It was posted a few days after the blerhg post was published, so it needed to be approved first. I don't really go looking for comments on days-old posts, so when I found this one, I pondered on it for just a bit.

At first, I published it... then started wording a response.  Then I thought, "fuck that guy."

I mean, for real.  I like my hat and for all the right reasons.

Although I did google "schill" this morning (at least the correct spelling, "shill."


1. an accomplice of a hawker, gambler, or swindler who acts as an enthusiastic customer to entice or encourage others.

Well, I don't think any of my sponsors would fall under the "hawker, gambler, or swindler" categories, but whatever.  Also, I think I do a fair job letting everyone know my associations... like right over there.

Anyhoo, I talk about things that make my life better (or worse) that have nothing to do with any of my "Dick supporters" listed on my sidebar.  As luck would have it, something I ordered with the hopes that it would change my life showed up Friday on my porch.

The Muc-Off X-3 Dirty Chain Machine.

I love a good chain cleaner.  You can go ahead and electrical tape your old toothbrushes together or buy a Finish Line Grunge Brush (I've broken three of them) or just use some random brush from the hardware store.  Unless you remove your chain and drop it into a ultrasonic cleaner, it's hard to get all the gunk outta the nooks and crannies with just a brush.  The problem with most chain cleaners is that they require some slack in the chain (from the rear derailleur) to route through all the rotating brushes and flaps.  Basically, I've had a hard time finding one that will work on my single speed(s).

I stared long and hard at the Muc-Off X-3 trying to figure out if it would work.  Looked like a straight shot in all the pictures, so I decided to take a chance and buy one.  Spoiler alert.  It works.

That's neat thing #1 about the X-3.  Instead of the chain being dragged through the degreaser/water in the bottom piece, the degreaser is drizzled on when you push the button down to release it.  All the goopy residue ends up in the lower reservoir, and the chain doesn't splash around in its own dirty bath water.
I can't say all was perfect.  The fit was tight with the chainstays and the rotating crank arm.  I had to be careful in the way that I held everything while spinning the crank around, but once I got used to it, buenos.

How did it work?
I'd all but given up on trying to get the gunk off the outside of the inner plates recently.  I've been pretty lax in tending to my Vertigo Meatplow V.7, just adding lube and wiping it down every once in awhile.  For months.  And months.

I've been "busy."

It was getting pretty nasty, but the X-3 pretty much removed everything.

And I didn't even have to use that much degreaser or effort, especially compared to scrubbing with a brush like a maniac.  Another upside is that the unused degreaser is still sitting nice and happy in the upper reservoir for its next use.  Nothing wasted.

Other things of note?  I was washing all my bikes thoroughly yesterday.  I was able to confirm that the X-3 will NOT work on 1/8" chains (like the one on my tarck bike).  It's just too wide.  Fortunately, the PC-1 has fewer nooks and crannies and is pretty open for brush cleaning.  That and I neglect that drive train... like with a sense of purpose.  Working on my work bike on my time sucks.

When I went to clean the JaBronson, I tried sticking my old Finish Line Pro Chain Cleaner (that I'd won at some race years ago) on it.  I quickly found out that SRAM's clutch didn't wanna play nice at all.  I couldn't get enough slack to feed the chain through AND get it locked shut.  I popped the cage into the locked forward position, but then everything (predictably) went to shit.

Enter the X-3 that doesn't require any slack because of the straight path the chain takes through the brushy bits.  It totally worked and was obviously way easier to use, being that there was a ton more clearance under the chain stay for cleaner.

I will go ahead and break this out now...

My Seal of Semi-Approval.

I wish that someone would just make one that fits in the confined space allotted with a single speed drive train.  Mebbe it's just assumed that single speeders are a dirty bunch who don't give shit-all about clean drive trains.  I'd wager tho, that with all the Perrier-sipping athletes that have taken to our sport over the last decade, my anal compulsions regarding a clean chain are not mine alone. 

Make it.  We'll buy it.*

* Or at least we'll send you sponsorship requests so we can "schill" it for you


Anonymous said...

This whole "internet outrage junky" culture is really getting out of hand, and I am baffled how one could get so worked up by a hat referencing a satirical military film. Stay strong, Diknus, stay strong....

Anonymous said...

Hey Dicky! How about a link directly to that chain cleaner. I couldn't find it on the Muc Off US site. I too am a cheapskate, I mean, single-speed aficionado, and my chains are often embarrassingly dirty.