Tuesday, June 30


Another #vanlife with Bill Nye.

Another late day boogie to Bent Creek on a Friday to keep it going before the sun go down.

We kept it.  Going.

Met up with Dubuc (again) and knocked out a quickie.  Was all the buenos.  Photo ops kept to a minimum for sure.

I do not know what this Blair Witch rope thing is.

Over to Dubuc's to sleep it off in his driveway... and on the way there, this:

Picture snapped outta respect.  This man is a lifestyle.  Support your local wrestler... a man who may or may not be area legend Ricky Morton.  He is owning it, and my only question is "Does he have a lot of those SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL WRESTLER shirts and does he ever leave the house not wearing one?"

I would not.


We got up kinda early and headed out towards... you guessed it...  Knoxville.  Third weekend in a row.  Probably the last... tho.

Breakfast #mountainpizza because the real breakfast didn't stick all the way through the drive.

Stone wall that pukes rocks for a living.

Wooden wall that pukes Bill Nyes for a living.

Tiny drop at the bottom of Devil's Race Track that pukes Dicks... just as a hobby tho.  Not a way to make a living.

Second #mountainpiza at the top of our second(?) run down Barn Burner.

Bill Nye and I stayed on the flowier side of things all day long, not wanting to be too wasted to not be able to enjoy a lift service day at Beech Mountain on Sunday.  At least that was the plan.

It was a rough night of sleep.  Intermittent storms and Bill Nye with his red flashlight vigilantly monitoring a leaky roof situation right over the bed.  We set our alarm early for the drive back towards NC... to find an absolute shit forecast for Beech.  Poop.

We reset our sites for Fire Mountain, as it seemed like that was our best chance to dodge the rain that was sticking towards the north...

Quick stop at the quarry at an actual open public bathroom and some uncrowded scenery gawking.

Without anyone around disturbing the peace, you could certainly hear the methane bubbling up with your nose.

Back on down the road...

Because we're idiots, we just followed Google Maps like 99% of the general population does when you really don't know how to get where you wanna go.  We had seen signs promoting Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg on Interstate 40, and we both wondered what it is about these places that draw the crowds of people that aren't the crowds of people we find ourselves in normally.

Then we pulled up to a light, saw this, checked Google Maps... and discovered that we were in Pigeon Forge.

 And we drove the length of it.  And people watched.

And because Bill Nye missed a turn at a bypass, we got to see Gatlinburg.  And People watched.  And then elk watched.

I don't know if I've ever seen an elk before, but judging by the three we encountered, elk do not give a fuck.

Drove to Cherokee, town number three in a row that seemed as if Greek god had eaten Myrtle Beach and pooped it onto the mountains.

We arrived at Fire Mountain... in a drizzle.  Guess it's time to see if these famous machine-built wünderkind trails drain as well as they say.

They do.  Also, #mountainpizza.

We didn't ride all the downs, but we got all the ups... aside from the Fire Tower trail.  Somehow climbing 571 feet over .7 miles with grades approaching 30% didn't seem like all the buenos.  Everything else seemed extremely fun, which is a shame.  Fire Mountain is sooooo far away from Charlotte that it would be hard to justify a day trip out there, but if you could incorporate it into a road trip, it's a gem.  None of the features are super huge, but the trails flow in both directions just fine (aside from the one way DH trail, Kessel Run).

That makes two trails that I know of called Kessel Run, which makes me wonder if George Lucas knows about them.  If he does, is he proud of the name being used for a mountain bike trail?  Would he want paid royalties if he knew?  Has he already made enough to buy a planet of his own and couldn't care less?


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

There is a kessel run in fruita too...