Captain's Blog: Star Date: 420:69

Agreed to a weekend camping/riding trip.  Like bikepacking AKA Amateur Homeless Personning but with cars and bikes and less sadness and arguing about FKTs and also more fun.

But the day one ride didn't start until 5:00PM, because... burrito?

Photo from day two because who wants to start with the first photo from day one?

Someone told me that they stopped making Snickers with "veins," but since this one was an expired bar I found in the trash at work, this may be pre-deveining.

I spotted Neko Mulally's much-hyped Frank the Welder frame in the parking lot at Ingles, and I noticed this IS NOT the rocker that is on it everywhere else on the internet.  I posted it on my IG story, but PinkBike must not be farming my socials for content.

I FINGER THE PULSE OF THE "INDUSTRY."

Now Venmo me at F.Reynolds@warthog-orgyfart.edu 

I told Stephen he was in the Wheelie Hallway, but apparently he doesn't believe in magic.

Turd does magic...

As did/do Bryan (not Brian).

Rides that start at 5:00PM require more thought than I thought with my thought part.  I'd eaten two Pop Tarts at 7:30AM, a fake chicken sammich at 11:30AM, a Snickers bar in the Ingles parking lot, and a beer while setting up my hammock before the ride. 

Around 7:00PM, I was ded enough to try that maple syrup "gel" I brought home from Moab Rocks...

Yuck.  It tasted just like maple syrup because surprise surprise it is maple syrup and it comes out in the consistency of maple syrup so beware if you have facial hair and also poor aim.

I told Turd that watching his attempts to make fire was like watching Survivor except the contestant dies from no fire.

I left Pisgah shortly thereafter.  I'm a rule-follower.

Pizza and waterfalls on day two.

I dug a hole on Saturday by not eating enough before the ride, recovering with beer and one standard can of Spaghettios Avec le Balls de Meat, and sleeping in a moist hammock.  I spent Sunday crawling outta that hole.

Yeet.

Yut.

Womp womp.
 

I did a whole lotta Saturday's ride deep in the red because "training," and then tried to keep it muy tranquilo mode on Sunday... which is pretty hard to do when you're going up the steeps on Daniel's Ridge or trying to keep the poop in your butt coming down the gnar.

PMBAR is less than two weeks from now, and it's hard for that to sink in, being that we just did it in October, and the scars have yet to fade.  I am combinations of excite, indifferent, blindside, confuse, and anxious.  At least I'm getting another chance to make all new mistakes this year!

So that's good, no?

Someone remind me how to ride a turgid single speed again please and thank and bless.