Bonehead mistakes are made.
Since I figured I wouldn't be riding my Vertigo Meatplow V.7 between Pisgah Monster Cross and the Fonta Flora Barnburner 50k (Oct 18), I went ahead and put the garvel wheels/tires back on the noodle bar bike (that I'd be sadly relegated to riding for awhile until I get molar betterer) and reinstalled the w-i-d-e Hydra crabon hoops with my usual 2.6/2.4 tire combo. Whilst I didn't wanna spin an extra pound and a half of rubber knobbies in circles, I also signed up so late that I didn't have the wherewithal to make the swap again.
Other dum dums? Not only did I forget that I can't reach my right jersey pocket and that's exactly where I put my Scandinavian Swimmers, I also made a mistake that I didn't know was possible. I decided to finally use some of the Chamois Butter samples I'd been collecting for years, and when I ripped that purple and yellow pack open and put a big squirt in my hand...
Sigh.
All that and once again I failed at loading a route on my Wahoo Data Acquisition Device or didn't start it properly and spent most of the day 129 feet from a right turn on to Valley "something."
Anyhoo...
There weren't a whole lotta riders present, but that was by design.
"This dry run is an opportunity to ride the full course with a larger group, provide feedback, and help refine logistics for the 2026 series."
And also this:
"No podiums—just community, effort, and post-ride beer and pizza/food. It’s not a race.
But… we all know better."
Hmmm... so you don't have to go fast, but there's always gonna be "tryers," isn't there?
The course is described as "front loaded fun," which means...
So... the good news is the single speed will only be a limiting factor down in that rolling valley, assuming the raging descent at the start doesn't destroy my untested shoulder or that my 32 X 19 was a poor choice given my inability to really pull up on the bars when climbing outta the saddle.
FWIW: People were on all manner of bikes, proper noodle bar bikes from an ENVE MOG to a steel Soma, to long travel hard tails with tiny tires and flat pedals and a pre-Boost Niner SS frame converted to noodle bar duties, and a fair amount of regular old full squish XC bikes. All we needed was a tall bike, a bakfiet, and a bearded dude in SPD sandals, and it woulda been like RAGBRAI... if it went down and up a mountain.
The first thirteen mile descent was a doozie. Rough and fast and most of the groups that were rolling together for the first five or so miles blew apart. I saw a few people dealing with flats, and that at least made me feel slightly better about my tire (non)selection. Down in the "valley," things went as expected. I was caught and passed while I helplessly spun and tucked and watched riders disappear ahead of me. At east I get to "look forward" to the climb?
There's a slight incline approach alongside Carroll Mill Creek that kinda worked out with my gearing. That said, I was riding along with Jason at a talking pace, he'd suffered a flat and a slow leak earlier... and I thought mebbe I'd have company for the first time. Then he saw Big 'n Buttery pulled over to help someone else with a flat...
"You have a pump?"
And just like that, Jason seized the opportunity to save his last CO2 and get some free air from Big 'n Buttery. Now I'm gonna be lonely again, but my thinking was as long as I could get to the base of the climb up Pineola before they can pull me back as a group, so bueno?
Well, it woulda been bueno, but they all came around me well before the aid station at mile 36. Most of them stopped, but I just grabbed a cookie and kept rolling, gambling on whether or not doing this whole thing on two large water bottles and the handful of candy I painstakingly swapped to my hip pocket was a stupid idea. I passed one rider on the early part of the climb, and from there, I essentially just stared at the colored arrows on my Wahoo Data Acquisition Device for an hour. Recover on the greens, stay seated on the yellows, stand on the oranges, and suffer through the reds. At the top, I realized I was still miles from the finish, but I went all-in anyways.
It was a welcome sight to climb up the gravel driveway of Wildhaven Farm. I rolled past the parked cars... nobody. Past the pizza and beer... nobody. Up to the timing clock and... I'm the first one here? 
I did not expect that in the least.
They took glamour shots in front of the pond, kind of a "who rode what" thing. Obviously, the best choice for next year's events is a rigid single speed with 2.6/2.4 tires, 780mm bars, and a 175mm drooper post.
So, first overall in the "non-race."
And first single speed (also in the "non-race").
Big 'n Buttery came up with the podium idea while he was riding up Pineola Road, obviously his brain not getting enough oxygen at the time. Kinda wished I woulda stood up, but being a couple beers deep and wobbly from the effort of the day, sitting was the choice move for this acrophobic old man.
So that was another good use of fitness, and although I went into this with a "this course don't make no sense" attitude, it kinda did. Good times, gooder ride, and great company.
Now back to the business of healing up proper.
Hmmm... so you don't have to go fast, but there's always gonna be "tryers," isn't there?
The course is described as "front loaded fun," which means...
FWIW: People were on all manner of bikes, proper noodle bar bikes from an ENVE MOG to a steel Soma, to long travel hard tails with tiny tires and flat pedals and a pre-Boost Niner SS frame converted to noodle bar duties, and a fair amount of regular old full squish XC bikes. All we needed was a tall bike, a bakfiet, and a bearded dude in SPD sandals, and it woulda been like RAGBRAI... if it went down and up a mountain.
The first thirteen mile descent was a doozie. Rough and fast and most of the groups that were rolling together for the first five or so miles blew apart. I saw a few people dealing with flats, and that at least made me feel slightly better about my tire (non)selection. Down in the "valley," things went as expected. I was caught and passed while I helplessly spun and tucked and watched riders disappear ahead of me. At east I get to "look forward" to the climb?
There's a slight incline approach alongside Carroll Mill Creek that kinda worked out with my gearing. That said, I was riding along with Jason at a talking pace, he'd suffered a flat and a slow leak earlier... and I thought mebbe I'd have company for the first time. Then he saw Big 'n Buttery pulled over to help someone else with a flat...
"You have a pump?"
And just like that, Jason seized the opportunity to save his last CO2 and get some free air from Big 'n Buttery. Now I'm gonna be lonely again, but my thinking was as long as I could get to the base of the climb up Pineola before they can pull me back as a group, so bueno?
Well, it woulda been bueno, but they all came around me well before the aid station at mile 36. Most of them stopped, but I just grabbed a cookie and kept rolling, gambling on whether or not doing this whole thing on two large water bottles and the handful of candy I painstakingly swapped to my hip pocket was a stupid idea. I passed one rider on the early part of the climb, and from there, I essentially just stared at the colored arrows on my Wahoo Data Acquisition Device for an hour. Recover on the greens, stay seated on the yellows, stand on the oranges, and suffer through the reds. At the top, I realized I was still miles from the finish, but I went all-in anyways.
So, first overall in the "non-race."
So that was another good use of fitness, and although I went into this with a "this course don't make no sense" attitude, it kinda did. Good times, gooder ride, and great company.
Now back to the business of healing up proper.
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