Monday, March 30

What's in the box??

What started out as a friend in Canada doing a friend in the U.S. a favor ended up as a beautiful thing, a love story that makes Marlee and Me look more like Saw 3 (or perahps vice versa; read on). There's a long story behind my old digital camera and the people of Nikon of Canada having it for almost two years, but that story is long and perhaps less than entertaining, and suffice to say not as thrilling as it would seem unless it was your camera involved in international matters as mine was at the time. The end result was that Peter of Misfit Psycles was willing to be my middleman in the transaction saving me somewhere in the neighborhood of $70 in shipping to get a camera (which had already been replaced twice over) back to my domicile.

I asked Peter if I could purchase a coupla sets of cassette spacers to replace the clapped out bike shop bin discards I'd been using since I started single speeding back in 2003. You know, a little sumpin-sumpin shiny for the new rig that's on its way. He said it wouldn't be a problem, but he wanted to wait till he got his new coasters in so he could send me some in the same box (you'll have trouble finding them on your own on his site since he lists them as Misfit Psycles Circular Death Discs).

So when the box arrived Thursday (the one with the fine artwork you saw last Friday), I found it to be much larger than I would have thought necessary in order to safely ship a small camera and a pack of five coasters. I opened it feeling like a kid at Christmas, albeit a balding child with a limited scope of imagination. Once inside I basked in the glow of love that shined out through the opaque plastic wrap and zip lock bags inside.

Notice if you will, that I am Conscript Number 000006. Peter actually took the time and consideration to make me number six (my favorite number) in a group that might eventually total 100,000 members. These coasters will identify me to my sweaty beveraged brethern as an official member of the Misfit Psycles Empire Team. Take that Rush Limbaugh.

What else did the generous box of cyclical love contain?

Well of course my spacers as requested, but also some sexy Cod Cogs.

Shown here is my Industry Nine race wheel equipped with the 18T Cod Cog and Misfit Psycles Conversion Kit BASIC spacers all ready to go to battle in this weekend's Six Hours of Warrior Creek. The Cod Cogs are much lighter than my trusted stainless steel cogs from the unmentionable manufacturer (that competes in the same realms as two of my other sponsors), and as such the uberlight Cod Cogs are race approved product.

The funny thing is that last year I managed to get by with just an 18,19, and 20 tooth cog. A few times I was wishing for a 21 for slower rides in the mountains, but I made due since I didn't feel like plunking down the $$$$'s to ease my pain. Imagine my excitement as I pulled a multipack of zip locked love from the box containing an assortment of Cod Cogs. I laid them out as I unpacked them, tearing up a little as I could feel the positive energy being transferred from the shiny black 7075-T6 aluminum to my trembling fingers, 18... 19... 20.... 22?

No 21? The one cog in the world I felt necessary to complete me was left out. Was this an oversight or perhaps a purposeful, well thought out mind game? I would need more information to form my opinion on that for sure, as Peter has all but declared a very public war to be fought at the Breck Epic this July.

What else could possibly be in the bottomless box of good times?

Evidently Peter wanted me to see how good I woulda looked in a Misfit jersey had I decided to race a Dissent in 2009. Little does he know I can make anything look good, so please don't base your purchase of said jersey on how sexy it looks in the above image. I assure you that's all me.

The last few items in the box have me thinking that the whole thing is surely some form of undeclared mind war Peter is trying to unknowingly wage on me. He sent along an FU Bar, an FU2 Bar, and two very long FUgly stems to try out. Of course he said he was only interested in helping me with my wrist issues (which he acknowledged as being quite limp), and he said he hoped he could help out with these ergonomic bike steering devices. I mounted up the FU Bar (being a big Tango and Cash fan) and the 120mm stem on my summer of 2009 training machine and headed out for a ride on Sunday.

Little did I know when I planned my stupid ride on Saturday that I would be riding in a 35 wind gusts for a great part of the day along the Charlotte Light Rail Line Corridor (as exposed to the wind as it sounds). The ride was as unpleasnt as all get out, but I must say that my hands were in a happy place. When I got home though I flipped the stem and put the bars on right side up as although my original set up felt good it would make it very hard to balance a box on it at work.

Not an optimal box hauling platform.

I also stared down at the currently unused FU2 Bars on my floor and realized that this may be just another attempt to mess with me.

Peter knows I mess with shit. He knows that when I have options I want to try them all no matter how wrong I know the outcome may be in advance. Having two stems with two ways to be mounted along with two bars that can also be mounted right side up/upside down I have something like 4,600 different configurations to consider. If I've done my math correctly it will take me five months to try them all, just enough to keep me totally distracted right up to the Breck Epic.....

Not convinced that this generous gift is a ruse? Consider the following:

This is a problem. Maybe this zip lock bag has a fart in it, but then again maybe not. The only way I'll ever know is to open it and find out. If Peter did successfully capture a gaseous moment in a bag do I want to smell it? I dunno, but some part of me wants to know, and it has me laying awake at night wondering if he did or didn't send me a fart in a bag. So you tell me, is this box a symbol of generosity and perhaps an olive branch ending a hard fought battle between two rivals, or is this just another sortie fired over the lines, a covert attempt to undermine all the good I have done and will do?? I'll give Peter the benefit of the doubt (hoping I don't regret it later) and add him to my list of athletic supporters for the 2009 race season.

Thanks Peter (or not). Your support (or hinderance) will not be forgotten.


cornfed said...

At least he didn't send a 21 tooth package with a 22tooth cog in it, ala my anxiously anticipated arrival of a 16 tooth cod cog, which although the bag said 16t was really a 17t... that one still stings.... Oh the humanity.

Peter Keiller said...

that baggie was full when i sent it.
you've opened it.

note to all: you may order what you'd like. i reserve the right to send you what you need.