The 2011 Awesome Straps Exposed

So I got this box chock full of the new Awesome Straps, and I messed with all of them over the weekend. First up...

The Vital.

This is the simplest and cheapest strap... the one you'll probably use since simple cheap people tend to read my blog.

Notice that the strap is very long and hangs out in the air like a zebra penis. The strap is extra long to accommodate whatever load you may install, but once you get a good idea just how long you need your zebra penis... I mean strap, you may cut it down.

In the end your tidy little bundle should look sorta like this:

Inside the tube I have a couple allen wrenches, a chain tool, and outside the tube is obviously a Niner CO2 cartridge and a tire lever.

I posted it yesterday, but here is how long it takes me to mount the Vital to my bike if I'm not in that much of a hurry:



Next up I played with the Zone strap.

It has a little more material in the rear to handle slightly bigger/awkward loads.

Straight from the horse's mouth:
"The high back ovular shape of zone itself was made to spread the holding force over a broader area to hold down the big air 40 with either a 26 or 9er tube during chattery conditions..."

I couldn't think of much to do with the Zone that was fun, so I used it in an informational (not to be confused with instructional) video. I figured some folks might look at the new straps and think they are complicated and thus would be slow to remove in a hurried situation. One doesn't want to be hindered in the process of fixing a flat in the middle of a racer boi moment. Here's how long it takes me to get my tube and other various shit out of the Zone:



I wish I put more thought into making videos. I am wearing my late father's very baggy sweat shorts, and that is a dog bed in the background sitting on my toolbox. Whatever. You get the point. Seven seconds from strapped to the post to ready to go.

The final strap is the most versatile one, the Rag Top. I thought I knew what this strap was about... keeping the mud off your tube and tools in nasty conditions.

I wasn't entirely correct in my assumptions.

Here's what the horse's mouth had to say about the Rag Top:

"The Rag Top strap was designed for the riders or bikepackers who want a dependable, bomber, versatile strap to compress loppy loads or to carry a little extra gear, multiple tubes or small med kit or whatnot into the backcountry for multiple days. The flap.. when pulled down.. will offer some protection but it was really designed to compress the load down from the top. Combine this top to bottom compressibility with the front to back pressure of the compression pocket and you have one quiet ride and a strap that conforms to any load size instead of conforming your load to a seatbag. The way I look at it ...the seatbag is a slow pain in the ass to mount ... has no versatility on placement and confines load size....can only mount in one pain in the ass location ..looks douchey...and has 6 sides too many to be considered Awesome....just sayin."

I decided to put it to the test. I thought "What might these bikepackery types want to carry into the wild?"

How about a rain coat?

With a little built of rolling and rubberbanding....

Voila!

Going out for a ride and it looks like rain? Don't wanna load up your jersey pockets for a long ride in a possible storm? Wanna save room in your pockets for a camera, iPhone, and all the other shit a blogging rider can't leave the house without? Stuff your coat in the Rag Top and go.

What about carrying multiple tubes for doing really stupid long races like Trans Iowa or the Dirty Kanza?

There's two full size 29'er tubes in there and room for a little something else if you want. Maybe a razor blade in case you'd rather slit your wrists than ride another 100+ miles on gravel roads? Bring it along just in case.

How about riding into possible cold weather or riding up a mountain where the air can get moist and chilly? How about a vest and arm warmers?

Not a problem.

Vests, coats, armwamers, tubes... how about beer? What's more mountain bike'esque than carrying a brew into the woods?

Fail.

That's what I get for buying high zoot beer just because I'm trying to keep a friend employed. I ran out to the store looking for a canned beer solution to my problem.

I wanted to pick up some Dale's Pale Ale, but at $9+ for a six pack I had to go with Tecate instead. Besides, since I was mounting the beer to my Tallboy it seemed like the right choice. Mike Ferrentino and the guys at Santa Cruz seem to think this is the PBR of SoCal.

How easy is it to strap up a beer using the Rag Top? I thought you would never ask...



One beer not enough? Don't forget that unlike a seatbag you can mount an Awesome Strap almost anywhere...


Which means your beer can go almost anywhere as well.

King Cage top cap cage mount? Who needs that?

I guess when I really think about it if you can mount a beer almost anywhere you can certainly mount any of that other worthless stuff all over the bike as well.

And that's all I have to say about that.

Hope I get to go for a ride next week. I don't want to spend another weekend strapping shit to my bike and making videos in my sweat shorts.