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Friday, November 2

I am a fool for your loving no more

I feel like a fool.  I only posted yesterday because I was so proud of my pal, Wes.  Last night I found out that I had fallen for an elaborate hoax.

Just as so many people were fooled into believing the Statue of Liberty/Sandy photo was real, I too fell for the work of a photoshop master and beguiling tale spinner.  He actually won a major award as owner of Sycamore Cycles, and did not in fact get first place in a coloring contest.

He actually got third in the coloring contest.

This weekend is big as far as cycling goes, but not in regards to doing any actual pedaling.  Tomorrow at 8:00 AM, the registration for the 2013 6 Hours of Warrior Creek goes live.  This race SELLS OUT in hours, so set your alarms (who needs an alarm for 8:00AM?) and have your credit card handy.  The entry fee is a reasonable $65 per racer, and although I'm committed to another Coed Duo appearance of the Last Minute Death Machine, I am super interested in this "Super Clydesdale 300lb+ SS Wht Bros Squishy Fork" category I've heard nothing about.  This is THE must-do race of the month of April, setting the bar for the season, though not in the same way they "set the bar" at the Trans-Sylvania Epic.

Totally different bar altogether.

On Sunday, it's the return of the Big Stampede Bike Expo and Swap Meet.


I have my shopping list ready.  Please come and rent a table and fill it with my required goods.  I'm still looking for that high-end mountain tandem being sold at a ridiculously low price by a captain who lost his stoker in a terrible limbo accident.

And finally...

I've been giving my self-imposed content embargo some thought.  Within a few hours of writing Tuesday's post, I realized I have a topic for further exploration, the death of the cycling blog.  What better way to explore said death than to write about the very topic on a cycling blog cursed to certain ironic self-implosion?  I will do my best to fully explain the who, what, where, why, when, and how of this phenomenon.  That should keep me busy for awhile.

So anyways, here's the new deal.  If I go to bed with a topic on my mind, I'll set my alarm early enough to write about it the next morning.  If I'm drawing a blank, I'll only allow myself enough time to drink 32oz of coffee, deal with the effects of 32oz of coffee, and brush my teeth.  No writing.

What does this mean for you?  More potential blog posts and something to read while your bowels move.  What does it mean for me?  No more waking up and staring at a blank screen scanning my bike room looking for something to blog about.

This is what is called a "win-win scenario," not to be confused with a "no-win scenario."

I don't believe in a "no-win scenario."

I will carry on like a wayward son.  There will be peace when I am done.

Play us off, Oderus Urungus (worth watching at least through the instrumental).


2 comments:

TheMutt said...

I'll make a deal with you:

You provide a Wht Bros Squishy Fork and I'll put some axle pegs on my SS so you can ride along with me.

The two of us together would just barely make the 300lb+ requirement since you're only about 75 lbs.

Moonshine said...

Stay out of my class, Posers! You think the tough guys in Point Break were bad? They've got nothing on a big-boned, pissed-off Redneck!